Shela, I’m so sorry for the betrayal in your marriage. I hope you understand that I’m not prescribing secrecy as a way of life. Your husband’s deceit and allowing others to know about it put them and ultimately you in a horrible position. In my situation, I didn’t see it as my role to do the dirty work of the cheating husband to inform his wife. If everyone lived as Hugh Prather recommends, life would be so much easier. I certainly agree with him but some choices are hard. Or, I should say, some people make that choice hard. I hope you’ve recovered from your catastrophe, if not yet, I hope peace is on the horizon.